While responding to a Migraine.com email about a post I was scheduled to do this month, I tried to say it was unlikely to happen because my health was still topsy turvy. My phone autocorrected to tipsy turbulent, which I may like even better. Though tipsy implies fun, which this has not been.
The short version: my migraines are different than they were before the infusions, but still come on every time I eat. I thought I had them figured out, then got a doozy. Then I thought I found a medication that helped, but it made things worse. I’m recovering from that medication now.
I move from optimistic to panicked to OK-maybe-I-can-figure-this-out, usually multiple times each day. I told a friend that I couldn’t get together because of a health crisis. This scared her. When I said it wasn’t life-threatening, she responded that she was glad it wasn’t serious. Except that it is. It’s not going to kill me, but it is serious. It could completely change what my days look like, moving me from writing and working and taking care of myself to a lump on the couch. It could mean that the freedom I enjoyed for a year will once again disappear. My drug-related freakout last Sunday made it all too clear that I’m terrified to go back there.
I told my doctor before the DHE infusions that if I got back to eating 40 foods without them triggering migraine attacks, I’d be thrilled. Now, I’d be thrilled to go back to being able to eat those 40 foods and controlling the ensuing migraine attacks with naratriptan and Midrin. It’s not a long-term solution, but it would be better than feeling like I’m in freefall.
So, yeah, things are topsy-turvy… tipsy turbulent… incredibly scary. I hope I’m headed in the right direction, but won’t know for at least a few more days.
P.S. Blurry vision is a new migraine symptom I developed this spring. It comes and goes; it has been in full force this week. I’m adding your 30 Things each day (we have more than 100 now! plus more on other blogs and Migraine.com), but that’s all the screen time I’m getting in. My spirit is with Migraine and Headache Awareness Month and I will highlight your stories, even if it’s long after June is over. Thank you all who have shared. I love learning about you and seeing your optimism, perseverance, and strength. If you haven’t had a chance to read these stories of fellow readers, please take a look at 30 Things. Want to share your story and enter to win a pair of TheraSpecs or a coaching session with me? Take a look at these instructions and be sure to submit before midnight Pacific time on June 29.