Community, Coping

Ripe for Failure

Are your goals realistic? Don’t sell yourself short, but don’t set yourself up for failure!” ChronicBabe editrix Jenni posed this question Monday. Little did she know that I was on the verge of doing exactly what she warns against.

I mentioned to friends on Sunday that I’d really like to walk a marathon someday. Naturally, I looked up marathon training schedules on Monday and found the routine for me.

With Jenni’s message echoing in my mind, I set out knowing I had to reign in my overachieving self. Instead of setting the marathon as my goal, I focused on making the first week’s training schedule the target. Once I maintained that program for awhile, I could move on to the next week.

Sounds reasonable — except that I can’t trick myself into believing the marathon isn’t my ultimate desire. The first week’s schedule looked achievable on Tuesday and even Wednesday; today it’s nearly inconceivable.

My head hurts and it hurt all night. I’m exhausted, but am trying to conserve energy because I’m meeting one friend for doughnuts tonight and another for breakfast in the morning. Two miles, which is normally an easy distance for me, looks like a cinch until I consider that my body has to participate.

Despite numerous attempts, I can’t ignore that the very same body holds the brain that’s in the rut of having a headache every single minute of every single day. Today it tells me that there’s no way am I walking two miles. I could push myself to do it, then be sorry that I had to pass up the chance to catch up with a dear friend (and eat a killer Boston cream doughnut).

However, I can take Jenni’s lead and go for a 10 minute walk. I could even reward myself with a latte at my current favorite neighborhood coffee house, ensuring that I get a half mile of exercise today.

Instead of berating myself for not reaching the goal today, I can be proud that I attended a yoga class on Tuesday and walked 3 miles (including a steep hill!) yesterday. Maybe I’ll go the distance tomorrow, or maybe I’ll take a leisurely stroll to admire neighbors’ houses. Whatever I do, I’ll try to remember that I’m doing the best I can.

3 thoughts on “Ripe for Failure”

  1. The whole pacing thing is such a challenge. I admire your ability to keep such a good perspective.

    I went to the donut shop link. Yum! I would love to try a “Pink Feather Boa” donut – it sounds interesting.

    It’s a perspective that frequently slips away, but I’m trying. That’s all any of us can do.

    I’ve never had a feather boa, but they sure look festive.


  2. Thank you Kerrie for the post and Terri for your comments too. I needed this today.
    Trying not to judge oneself and to be happy with the accomplishments you can acheive.
    Thanks again so much. Cyndi

    It’s easier said than done, but sometimes saying it makes doing it a little easier.


  3. kerrie- sounds like you are getting the hang of this pacing thing. yes, it sucks. but i think it does work, to set small goals, take one day at a time. i am trying to get more activity too, more fibre, more water, a better diet, and it is one step at a time. try not to judge yourself. remember to be kind to yourself – you handle so much already that you should be so proud of yourself, not judging that you are deficient. you aren’t. you are striving and learning and that is so positive so go easy on yourself and easy on the new program!

    Thanks for the support. I say that I’m not judging myself, but I’m still having a lot of trouble putting it into practice. Having to pace myself is so frustrating (as most of you reading this know!).


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