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I’m Out of Cope Due to Depression

After posting Food and Migraine Frustrations: I’m All Out of Cope, I finally looked at all the pieces that were frustrating me (and how I was overreacting to everything and felt helpless) and realized they added up to depression. I was still waffling until the day I woke up and didn’t want to get out of bed. Then I knew it was time to increase my Wellbutrin.

I started feeling better almost immediately. It’s highly unlikely that the Wellbutrin made such a difference so fast, but recognizing what was happening and taking steps to change it was a big relief. I’m also seeing some improvement in my diet and pinpointing the foods (and possibly a supplement) that have been problematic. And one day out of every four is (usually) trigger-free.

Unfortunately, I’m not getting enough calories to support 300 mg of Wellbutrin without side effects. Like happened when I was on Tolerex in December, I get dizzy looking down or working at the computer. Once again, it’s keeping me from working much.

I’m still frustrated, but no longer feel helpless or overwhelmed. I’m taking each hour as it comes and trusting I’ll figure this out eventually. (That sounds so trite, but it’s totally true.) I’m not sure what “this” looks like, how long it will take or how many migraines a week (or day) it will mean. And that’s OK.

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