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Acceptance, My Best Treatment

This flowed out of Don’t Give Up on Finding a Treatment. It’s the most effective of all the headache treatments I’ve tried — and the hardest to get.

You may be surprised to learn I feel I’ve had success in treating my headaches. I still have pain, mental fogginess, a super sniffer and many other largely unknown symptoms of migraine. Yet I’m full of hope.

To me, hope isn’t about finding a magic bullet. It’s knowing that I can have a full and joyous life despite my illness. Something that I wrote when I first started blogging explains this idea well:

The Anatomy of Hope, by Dr. Jerome Groopman, draws a line between hope and positive thinking. Groopman, an oncologist and hematologist, has treated patients with life-threatening illness for 30 years, many of whom have survived against the odds. The definition of hope that he offers is that “Hope is the elevating feeling we experience when we see – in the mind’s eye – a path to a better future. Hope acknowledges the significant obstacles and deep pitfalls along that path. True hope has no room for delusion.”

The better future he mentions does not require living without disease. Yes, people often overcome their diseases or are able to live without pain. But the better future Groopman describes can also be learning to live joyously even with debility.

Two years ago I didn’t understand the distinction. I am thankful for the time I spent in denial, but am even more grateful that my current version of being positive is rooted in reality. A reality that means I spend more days than I want in bed, but that I’m not emotionally miserable on those days.

I’m not saying that you just have to be positive and your headaches will go away. Nor do I think you can simply decide to accept your fate and go from there. Like all things in life, it’s a process. There’s no timeline to follow, but you will notice that you’ve began to have more acceptance than you once did.

If you want some help along the way, check out The Chronic Illness Workbook and Chronic Illness and the Twelve Steps. Therapists who specialize in chronic illness can also be tremendous help.

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